Women have innate caring and nurturing instincts that are within our genetic makeup, but we need to hear empowering messages too.
It’s natural for women to put the needs of others first and forget about empowering yourself but here’s a question for all women, posed by Texan author and entrepreneur CaDori in her new book, Women Put Yourselves First and Be Happier, do you ever put yourself and only yourself first?
It’s okay if you don’t, no one is judging you and we all do it. In fact, a lot of women often get lost focusing on other people that they forget to focus and think about their own needs – something that CaDori wants to change. In her self-published book, she draws on her own experiences to advise and empower women on how to care for themselves and put themselves before others.
After her son, Bobbie (Dougie), died in a tragic accident in 2010, the author was inspired to write the book because he always told her, ‘Make yourself happy first Mom.’ The determined mother of five wanted to share her passion for self-love for all the women out there who always care for others before themselves. “I realized that regardless of whatever financial, racial or social background women are from, we all share some commonalities, of which putting others first in our lives the majority of the time, was definitely one.”
We love an inspiring story here at MelanMag, and every opportunity to empower and encourage, we’re all for it. Here are eight of the most inspiring lessons that Women Put Yourselves First and Be Happier has taught us, so we can teach you too.
Stop making excuses
“I’ve found that when people want to do something, they will find a way, if not, they’ll find an excuse. So why do we keep making excuses that block our own happiness if we want to be happy? You can be happy if you choose to be, it is not impossible or unreachable.”
“If you wake up complaining, are met with bad news or someone says something negative to you, your day will likely unfold much more negatively as a result – to combat this you must immediately reaffirm yourself with a fresh, positive mindset to reposition your day back on the right track. One example of a positive affirmation you can tell yourself: “I am alive and I am here for a reason, so I am going to have the best day that I can possibly have, regardless of what anybody has to say.”
You can do anything, and we mean anything
“Each of us has the capability of doing anything we want, chasing any goal we can dream up, and being anything we are willing to do the work that it takes to make the aforementioned become a reality.”
Happiness comes first
“Whatever the reason may be that you choose to put your own happiness anything less than first, is definitely an excuse. It doesn’t matter if you have children, a husband, great friends, or close family members, the truth is that your happiness should come first in your own life, and if you don’t put yourself first then no one else will.”
You are responsible for your own happiness
“Do not allow yourself to get caught up in any form of trapped thinking, which is the type of thinking that leads you into a corner you can’t get out of. You have to believe that you come first and you have to live it everyday, because when you are not happy the stress will come, the overeating or under eating will come, the high blood pressure will come, and all other unhealthy things will come your way. So, as women, we must stop making excuses and start putting ourselves and our happiness first.”
You don’t need to wait for others to change
“…life is too short to just keep waiting on people to change – the truth is, they may never change and they may die that way. The time and energy that we put into people who will never, ever value or accept is time we will never get back. It’s incredibly unhealthy mentally, and it’s exhausting.”
You are yours to fall in love with
“You have to take accountability for yourself and start spending time alone. Get to know who you are. Fall in love with yourself like never before.”
Believe in the power of patience
“Stop hoping for things to change in your life if you don’t believe that they will! If you reaffirm yourself that you will be successful by doing everything your power to achieve said success, you will be successful. It won’t happen overnight, but if you persevere it will eventually. You have to first believe that it will happen, then keep working to make it happen.”